How to Plan a Birthday Party That Feels Like You: Real Stories, Real Budgets, No Fluff

Birthdays are all about celebrating you (or someone you adore). But the truth is, they can be stressful — especially if you want the party to be memorable. From figuring out a theme to nailing down the guest list to deciding on props and party favors, a lot goes into bringing a magical birthday vision to life. And as you’ve probably already discovered, searching how to plan a birthday party rarely brings up any advice you hadn’t already thought of yourself.

Still, celebrating in style is worthwhile. In a 2025 Peerspace survey of 1,000 people who planned an adult birthday party in the past two years, 71% said birthdays should be celebrated with meaningful parties — no matter your age. That’s why we wrote up this guide, based on the experiences of real, live people who’ve hosted some of the most unforgettable birthday celebrations we’ve ever seen — and the expert party planning professionals who helped them. They’ve got the insider tips and tricks to help you celebrate the big day, your way.

Meet the experts:

Meet the birthday party hosts:

Quick birthday party checklist for adults

1. Define your vision
2. Set a budget
3. Choose the date & time
4. Find a venue
5. Make the guest list
6. Plan decor
7. Calculate food & dessert needs
8. Plan drinks
9. Figure out entertainment
10. Decide how you’ll capture memories
11. Confirm RSVPs
12. Finalize vendors
13. Run final errands
14. Set up
15. Be present!
16. Breakdown

What really matters when planning a birthday party today

We’re about to dive deep into all the nooks and crannies of party planning. But before we get ahead of ourselves, let’s take a quick step back. Why do birthday parties matter in the first place?

The first answer might be the most obvious: Parties are just plain fun! But they’re about so much more than that, too: they offer us moments of connection, meaning, and even identity. Our survey results show that 57% of respondents rank spending meaningful time with friends and family among the top reasons to throw a birthday party. Creating lasting memories follows at 47%, and enjoying a fun activity or experience at 43%.

See below for the breakdown by generation:

The best parties merge all of these values — and more. Langhorne’s party is a perfect example. Although the day was technically in celebration of his 50th birthday, the unbirthday theme meant that his guests were really the ones being honored. By throwing this party, he was able to transport himself and his guests to an imaginative, one-of-a-kind setting so they could connect and seal their bond with unforgettable memories. “The main thing I wanted was a feeling I wanted my guests to leave with,” he recounts, “I wanted them to feel like they’re in another time and another world.” It worked: his guests still talk fondly about the party, even months after it’s ended.

Parties also give us a chance to express ourselves — as we can see in the widely varied themes of our interviewee hosts’ parties. Designing a party that’s truly you is a way of inviting intimacy with your guests. By participating in your picture-perfect birthday party, invitees can’t help but get to know you better. The same is true of all the people who might see the snaps of your party on social media.

Most of all, though, parties give us a moment to pause our busy lives and remember what truly matters. “Even at the most minimal,” says Moralez, “celebrate.” Even a small party can mean a lot. It gives you and your loved ones a chance to gather, connect, and enjoy life’s most important moments — and create everlasting memories.

Step 1: Define your vision (At least six months before)

The very first step in bringing any vision to life is to, well, have one — and to see it as clearly as possible in your mind’s eye. For big milestone birthdays, that could mean beginning the planning process months — or even years — in advance.

Langhorne, for instance, got an inkling that he wanted to throw an all-out gala for his 50th three years before it would actually arrive, while he was attending his sister’s 50th birthday. (His event planner, Moralez, helped make that one happen, too.) “I’m not really big on birthdays,” he said — which is why he decided to make his party a celebration of everyone else’s unbirthday. From there, the Alice in Wonderland theme basically wrote itself.

Of course, Langhorne is a professional conceptual illustrator who’s sketched proposed theme park attractions and stage shows. His idea came to him with a lot of visual details. Not everyone is so imaginatively gifted — which is where other forms of inspiration come into play.

The first place to look? At the people around you. According to our survey, nearly two-thirds of party planners (66%) were inspired by friends and family. Of course, social media opens the door even wider — especially for younger generations. Some 44% of Gen Z respondents and 50% of Millennials said they found their party planning inspiration on Instagram; 46% of both groups turned to TikTok. YouTube, X, Reddit, and AI assistants like ChatGPT are also popular options — and some blogs, like ours, actually do have good adult birthday theme ideas.

Here’s the complete breakdown of where Gen Z and Millennials are finding their birthday party inspo:

Santiago, who throws herself a themed birthday party every year, can even find inspiration in an outfit. “If I get a specific dress or a piece that I feel really inspired by, I’ll want to run with that,” she says.

Either way, if you’re figuring out how to plan a large birthday party, getting an early start is key — and honestly, having enough time makes it a lot easier to complete the steps to plan even a casual party.

Should you hire a party planner?

While some might consider hiring a professional party planner only for once-in-a-lifetime events like weddings, even for smaller celebrations, they can be a major help — and many can customize their services and rates depending on your needs. Moralez, for example, says some of her clients simply want her to craft their table centerpieces, while others need assistance throughout the entire planning process.

Even if you don’t hire a professional planner, having a close friend or family member who’s willing to share some of the responsibilities with you — even if it’s just a last-minute cake pickup — can make a big difference. That’s especially true if you’re planning a big blowout party like Langhorne’s. When asked how he would advise someone attempting to plan a similarly epic celebration, having someone to help was his very first tip. “You can’t do all of this by yourself,” he said. “You need your support system.”

Step 2: Set a budget (At the same time you define your vision)

You could technically consider setting your budget step 1.5. That’s because having an idea of what you want to spend can help clarify your vision. Plus, figuring out your budget early can help you save money, says Leo: more budget lead time means more time to shop around for everything from food to decorations, and maybe (depending on your timing) to take advantage of major annual sales like Black Friday.

Plus, managing the budget is the single most stressful, difficult and confusing part of planning a birthday party, according to our survey respondents. Having your number in mind right at the beginning can set you up for the smoothest possible planning journey in the long run.

But first things first: How do you set a birthday party budget?

What is a reasonable budget for a birthday party?

Like every other part of the birthday-party planning process, what’s “reasonable” or right depends on you. And it can change depending on the circumstances: maybe you (or your child) are hitting a major milestone, like 16 or 60, and you want to throw an unforgettable bash. Or maybe you’re ready to celebrate a quieter year, like 32 or 53.

Either way, it’s totally possible to throw a can’t-miss party on a budget. In fact, in our survey, the median cost of an adult birthday party was $500. Almost a third of respondents (293 out of 1,000) said they spent between $100 and $299.

Here’s the average birthday party budget comparison by gender and generation:

Still, others threw knock-out fêtes for thousands. It really is all up to you.

A good way to start is to figure out how much you can afford to spend in total, and then break that amount down into categories. Here’s one rough template based on a $1,000 budget (though your specific categories may change depending on what’s most important to you):

Sample $1,000 birthday party budget

• Catering/food: $400
• Venue: $250
• Attire and accessories: $100
• Cake: $80
• Drinks: $75
• Decor and ambiance: $50
• Miscellaneous (invitations, party favors, tips, etc): $45
• Entertainment: $0 (Spotify playlist and DIY games)
• Photography and videography: $0 (Ask friends to photograph on their phones)

Total: $1,000

As you’ll see throughout this article, though, each category can change a lot depending on the total budget, the type of party and other factors. We’ll include our hosts’ full budget breakdowns below so you can see some real-life examples. Check out our next guide for a complete breakdown of adult birthday party budget data.

Pro Tip: Along with DIY tools like Google Sheets or Excel, you can also check out easy-to-use pre-made event budgeting calculators like EventBudgetCal, which are fully customizable and automatically populate with common party categories.

Step 3: Set a date and timeframe (4–6 months before)

One good thing about planning a birthday is that the date is already picked for you, to some extent. Chances are you want to throw the party on or around your actual birthday.

But depending on the type of party you want to throw, it might not be quite that simple — especially if you’re hoping your guests will be able to hang out for a longer block of time (like the four or so hours it takes to solve a murder mystery). You’ll also want to consider the scheduling differences between a daytime party (Sunday brunch extravaganza) or an evening shindig (a dance-floor filled Friday night). 

According to Peerspace data, the most popular birthday party start times are, in order:

• 6 p.m.
• 5 p.m.
• 7 p.m.
• 4 p.m.
• 8 p.m.
• 3 p.m.

Keep in mind, too, that timing may also affect the availability and price of vendors and venues. Although Saturdays are, according to our data, the most popular days for birthday party bookings, they’re also the most expensive at an average of $863. Meanwhile, Wednesdays — the least expensive — come in at just $480 on average.

Traditionally, most people have more free time on weekends, but with the rise of freelancing and the gig economy, that might not be the case for everyone on your guest list. 

Pro Tip: Depending on the size of your party, you may not be able to include everyone — but for the core group of people who absolutely can’t miss it, consider setting up a Doodle with several dates and times to figure out a window that works for everyone. 

Step 4: Choose a venue (Around the same time you set a date)

Once you’ve got a date in mind, you’re ready to choose a venue. Given that where you’ll party affects everything else about how you’ll party, it’s a good idea to start here before worrying about other big-ticket planning items like entertainment or food.

If you’re lucky enough to live in a larger house or have a big, beautiful backyard, you might be able to have your party at home — which could save you not only money, but also travel time and set-up hassle on party day.

But in many cases, an at-home party just isn’t workable: The vibe isn’t right or your guest list is too big. From there, you have two main options: free (or low-cost) venues and paid venues. Both have their own drawbacks and benefits to consider.

Free and low-cost party venues

Chances are, there are many locales close to your home that are both party-friendly and totally free. Common options include:

• Parks, including city and neighborhood parks (though beware if you’re planning to drink alcohol: It may be prohibited, or you may need to buy a permit).
• Beaches, whether lake-side, river-side or ocean-side — though, again, open container laws and bonfire restrictions are worth brushing up on.
• Neighborhood streets and sidewalks are another option if your whole block is in on the game. Many cities have quick and easy online applications for block party permits, which may either be free or come with a small fee (usually $25 or so). Note: the cost of the permit may increase if you apply less than two months before the party.

While these free and low-cost party venues can cut total party costs, they’re also public spaces, which means you have less control over your environment. That’s why plenty of party planners turn instead to paid venues.

Paid party venues

Figuring out where to throw a birthday party can feel complicated — especially when you realize that some of the most popular home rental options don’t allow parties. (We’re looking at you, Airbnb.)

There are plenty of other common options, of course — think restaurants and event halls — which can offer plenty of private space and an all-inclusive package that makes the planning process super easy. However, they can often come at high costs and with required built-in services (i.e. catering or decor) that might not suit your style. Plus, you may have to book for an entire day when you only need a few hours.

Peerspace is an option that checks a lot of boxes for many party planners: You can rent a wide variety of birthday party venues for the exact amount of time you need. The average hourly cost for a Peerspace birthday venue is $130.26. That means a three-hour party would cost less than $400. Peerspace offers many types of venues, but the most popular choices for birthday parties are:

• Flex spaces
• Lounges
• Daylight studios
• Bars

Fun fact: Peerspace birthday spaces have an impressive average rating of 4.79 stars. But who’s bragging?

Just be sure to keep in mind that you’ll need to rent the time you need for set-up and take-down, too — especially if you’re planning to transform the party space into a birthday wonderland, like Langhorne. And if possible, said Santiago, see if you can check out the venue ahead of time: a little bit of familiarity can go a long way toward helping you plan and even speed the setup process. If you go with Peerspace, most hosts welcome site visits — these are short, in-person walk-throughs of the venue before you book, so you can see the space, ask questions, and make sure it fits your needs.

Step 5: Make the guest list and send invitations (At least two months before)

It might feel extra to ask people to save the date months before your birthday. But every single host and expert we interviewed said the same thing: In the world of party planning, earlier is always better — and that extends to your guest list, too.

For starters, planning the guest list early gives you plenty of lead time when it comes to figuring out any challenging social dynamics that might arise. Maybe you have two close friends who don’t exactly get along, for example; figuring out who to invite to your birthday party early can give you time to have conversations with each of them and determine what feels most comfortable for everyone.

Furthermore, early planning can actually help you stay on budget. While bigger groups don’t always mean bigger impact — and do almost always increase cost. For a reference point, according to our survey, the average birthday party had 24 guests, while the median size was 15.

Additionally, earlier is definitely better if you’re hosting a costume party or otherwise expect some kind of preparation or participation from your guests. Santiago sent her save-the-dates a month beforehand to give her guests time to search for their perfect 1930s attire, while Langhorne sent an initial save-the-date fully seven months before his party. (He followed up with more specific details a few months later.)

The good news is, the invites themselves can be very low-cost or free and still feel official and cute: Partiful offers fun digital invitations and RSVP tracking that’s totally free, and Paperless Post’s upgrades usually don’t top a dollar per invite. We have a built-in invitation feature here at Peerspace, too, which is both easy and free.

Just be sure to include information not only about the date, time and locale, but also about expectations — including whether or not plus-ones are okay and a snippet about what to wear or bring. That includes whether or not gifts are expected, a point that bamboozles some invitees; many friend circles decide that, at a certain point, dropping the expectation for gifts eases both financial and social pressure.

Step 6: Dream up decor (At least one month before)

It’s one of the most variable party factors — and one of the most fun. Depending on your vibe, decor and props might take up the biggest part of your party budget and setup time, or just be a few quick, special touches. Either way, thinking it through ahead of time is key.

One of the most important factors (and part of the reason we’re listing this step so early) is to ensure the decor you have in mind works with, rather than against, the limits of your venue or location. For example, Langhorne had considered some tall table centerpieces that were wider at the top than the bottom, but quickly discovered that in his outdoor Wonderland setup, they would quickly fall over at the slightest breeze. Moralez suggested he lay them down flat on the table, but if he’d thought about it ahead of time, he might have chosen a different decor item. (Fortunately, there was so much else going on design-wise, his guests didn’t even notice.)

Finally, keep in mind that in our day and age, your party is highly likely to be highly photographed — which means that many hosts consider Instagramability when figuring out decorations. In our survey, 17% of Millennials said aesthetics were a priority when planning a party. Among Gen Z, 16% said the same. The Instagram factor mattered slightly more to women than to men.

Santiago says she aims for good vibes first — knowing snaps and posts will naturally follow. “To me,” she says, “it just always had to look nice. If people like it, they’ll take a picture of it and share it.”

Pro Tip: You truly can dream big on the party decor front without spending a fortune. Everyone we interviewed said they scored perfectly on-theme finds at discount dealers, including Amazon, Target, Walmart, Trader Joe’s, Dollar Tree, and even Shein. This is also a great area to bring in any DIY skills you might have, especially for elements like table centerpieces or flower arrangements.

Step 7: Plan the food and dessert (At least one month before)

Although the word birthday might more readily call to mind cake than any other dish, the main meal can make or break any party. In fact, according to our survey respondents, the quality and variety of food was the single most important party factor, followed up by entertainment and activities. But don’t worry, we’ll get to the cake, too.

The best way to serve your guests will depend on the type of party you’re throwing — and what your venue allows. For context, after “bring your own beer,” the second-most-searched-for feature among Peerspacers looking for a birthday venue is “bring your own food.” 

Meanwhile, an afternoon backyard barbecue invites a potluck-style approach, whereas if you’re renting out a room in a restaurant, chances are you’ll be eating off their menu. Here are some of the most common options:

• Restaurant meals are obviously the likely choice if you have your party at a bar or restaurant. This choice simplifies planning, but can also get pricey.
• Catering allows you to bring professional food to a private venue, and is a very typical choice for Peerspace birthday parties. You may be able to choose between a more affordable buffet option and a pricier (but more refined) sit-down plated dinner.
• A potluck allows your friends and family to get in on the fun and ensures everyone can find something they like — though you’ll have less control over what’s on the menu.
• Ordering takeout is also an option, especially for smaller parties (10 people or fewer) held at home.
• Finally, of course, you can also cook your own meal, though doing so might add complexity to your big day!

If your party will be for a shorter timeframe or fall in between main meal times, you may be able to get away with serving only snacks and hors d’oeuvres — but chances are your guests will be happier (and willing to stay longer) if they’re well fed. Food is often one of the biggest budget items for birthday parties. In our interviews, hosts consistently ranked it near the top, and in our survey, it was the #1 expense and priority when planning a birthday party overall.

The internet is awash in fun, party-ready recipes, and using an AI assistant like ChatGPT can make it easier to narrow down the onslaught. If you’d rather have someone else do the work, searching for caterers in your area is a good start, but be sure to check out the reviews. Even better, get a recommendation from a friend whose birthday dinner you still think about. Word-of-mouth is one of the best ways to find trustworthy, high-quality vendors. 

Meeting dietary restrictions

If there’s one sure party foul, it’s not having enough food for everyone — or at least some type of food that everyone can eat. Asking your guests ahead of time for any dietary restrictions or allergies is a non-negotiable. No one’s going to the hospital on your big day!

It can also be a relatively easy task — really! — to serve up a menu that meets common dietary restrictions, such as being gluten-free or vegetarian. Especially if you’re going with a catering service, many will have these common necessities as an option you can choose. If you’re going the DIY route, a charcuterie board can easily be made gluten-free, so long as you check the packages of any crackers; separate the cheese-and-fruit board from any salami, and you also have a convenient snack station for vegetarians. Yet again, ChatGPT is a great aid if you want more help brainstorming.

Figuring out how much food you need

As far as figuring out exactly how much food you’ll need, there are a variety of helpful online calculators that make it as simple as inputting data points like how many people will be at your party, how long you’ll be there, and what type of party it’ll be. They each have their own unique features:

Helpful food and drink calculators

• The Guestimator asks you to estimate guests’ appetite levels and whether you want leftovers.
• Pickytarian’s calculator includes options for kids’ meals, making it ideal for kids’ parties.
• Party by Me offers a food and drink calculator that also accounts for non-drinking adults. (More on alcohol in just a second!)

Who pays for food and drinks?

Some party planners wonder if it’s ever okay to ask guests to chip in for their own meals. Generally speaking, and especially if you’re having the party catered or hosting it at a high-end venue,  it’s considered polite to foot the bill for your guests. That’s part of what it means to be the host. 

However, if it’s a smaller or more casual gathering of adult friends, you may be able to ask your guests to pay their own way. It depends on the politics and norms of your locale and social circle — but either way, make sure you make the expectation clear up front so that no one’s left with an unpleasant, expensive surprise when the party’s over.

Cake costs and alternatives

Yes, birthday cake is a big, delicious deal — and you may be able to score a beautiful cake that feeds your whole party at your local bakery for around $100. Since birthday cakes are rarely as elaborate and extensive as wedding cakes, they often cost far less. 

That said, there are plenty of ways to get creative around your birthday dessert, whether it’s opting for mess-free, grab-and-go options like cupcakes or doing something even more non-traditional like a chocolate fondue fountain. If you go this route, you can still have a big moment with blowing out a candle or otherwise pausing for birthday-song singing and wish-making. It doesn’t have to look exactly like the regular ritual to hold all the same energy.

Step 8: Plan beverages (About one month before)

You don’t have to drink alcohol at a party to have an incredible time. At an adult birthday party, drinks — whether cocktails, mocktails or sparkling water — can help keep the energy flowing. 

There are plenty of ways to provide drinks at a party, each with their own pros and cons to consider. Some of the primary options include:

• Hosting an open bar, which makes it easy for your guests to imbibe as they desire (but can be very expensive for you).
• Offering drink tickets for an onsite bar, which gives guests a leg up but asks them to pay past a certain amount.
• Having the party at a self-pay bar, where guests can choose if they want to drink (and pay for it).
• Having a BYOB party, which has the added bonus of ensuring everyone’s drinking exactly what they like. (This is what Santiago did for her murder mystery — which worked out well, since she doesn’t drink herself and therefore isn’t very familiar with alcohol options.)

Pro Tip: Just like planning a birthday party menu, planning the drinks list comes down to knowing your guests and your intended vibe. It can be a lot of fun, for example, to incorporate a themed cocktail; Langhorne served Jabberwocky Juice that was bright purple and, thanks to dry ice swizzle sticks he found online, served smoking. 

Step 9: Plan entertainment (At least one month before)

With the right crew, just hanging out together is already a perfect party activity — but planning some fun and entertainment never hurts!

For an in-depth experience like a murder mystery, often, hiring a company to host the game is the easiest way to pull it off — which is what Santiago did. Although hiring the host was easily the most expensive part of her party, it was also exactly what made it an unforgettable event.

You can also DIY fun games, as Leo did for her bowtastic pink coquette party, inventing a pink-themed blindfolded collection game with nothing but laundry baskets and soup ladles. Sure, it was for a kids’ party, but can you imagine how much more fun that would be with a couple of beers on board? Here are some other creative birthday activities for adults to consider. 

Music, too, is part of this step — and can make or break a party, so don’t skip it! While free Spotify playlists are an easy go-to, if keeping the dance floor working all night is a key part of your perfect party, it may be worth hiring a DJ (find questions to ask DJs before booking here). You might be able to save some money by hiring one only for the hours you truly expect to be dancing — when other party activities, like eating dinner, are done with.

Step 10: Plan for memory making (At least one month before)

Although you’ll have many birthdays in your life, you’ll only have one of each — which means each one is a once-in-a-lifetime experience that deserves to be captured.

While it’s not as common to hire a professional photographer for a birthday party as it is for, say, a wedding, it’s definitely worth considering, especially if you’re throwing an extravagant party with visual touches.

However, these days, the cameras in our pockets mean everyone is a photographer — and that you can get plenty of photographic (and even videographic) coverage without paying a single cent. Santiago upped the ante by buying a single disposable camera for her friends to pass around and take snaps with, while also asking her photographer boyfriend to capture the event on film. (After all, that’s all they had in the 1930s!)

Pro Tip: Capturing the moment can be part of the fun. Along with low-cost options like Santiago’s disposable camera, you might also consider hiring a photo booth — which turns memory-making into an interactive party activity. They’re surprisingly affordable to rent, with prices starting around $100 per hour. If you choose to hire a professional, these questions can help you find the right one.

Step 11: Confirm RSVPs (At least two weeks before)

As much as you want everyone on your guest list to show up to the party, life happens — and some people likely won’t be able to make it. On the other end of the spectrum, some guests might have plus-ones to bring (if allowed). All of it can have a major impact on the vibe of your party.

Knowing who’s going to be there ahead of time helps you nail any last-minute adjustments to the number of seats or amount of food, as well as simply giving you a heads-up about who to expect. Otherwise, you might spend the first hour or so of your party waiting around for someone who’s not going to show. The digital invitation companies we listed above, Partiful and Paperless Post, make it easy to track RSVPs — just be sure to specify in the invitation when you’d like guests to RSVP by. 

Pro Tip: If RSVP day arrives and some guests still haven’t indicated their plans, you can send a gentle follow-up. Specific verbiage and delivery method may vary depending on your social circle, but a text message is a simple and effective vehicle to check in. One way to put it might be, “Hey, hope you’re doing well! Just wanted to check in about the party on [date]. We’re finalizing headcount, and I didn’t see your RSVP come through. Will you be able to make it?”

Step 12: Finalize vendors (Days leading up to party)

If you’ve been following this step-by-step process so far, you’ll ideally have figured out your relationships with any day-of vendors, like caterers or bartenders, well ahead of time.

But keeping in touch with those vendors up until the celebration is key, says Moralez. 

“The night before,” she advises, “make sure that you check in with your vendors to make sure everything is set.” While she’s been diligent enough with her own clientele to avoid any mishaps, she’s heard horror stories about balloon services scheduled for mid-morning not showing up until mid-afternoon, for example. This is also a great time to get up to speed on which of your vendors or service-providers it’s customary to tip, so you’re not frantically googling or making an ATM run at the eleventh hour. 

As always, your specific vendor list will vary, but here are some people that you may want to call to confirm with in the days leading up to your party: 

• Caterer
• Bartender/drink service
• Bakery (for cake)
• Table/serveware rental services
• Entertainers or DJs
• Decor vendors (like balloon service)

It’s even a good idea to check in with your venue rental host a day or two before your event to avoid any last-minute miscommunications around load-in or set-up times.

Pro Tip: This is a list item that can be easily delegated to your party planner or organizer, if you have one. After all, you may not want to spend the day before your party on the phone. 

Step 13: Last-minute pickups and purchases (Hopefully a day or more before

Even the most on-top-of-it planner will have a few last-minute to-do items, whether it’s picking up the cake or doing a last-minute ice run for the cooler. Ideally (and probably, since you’ve already planned so well), you’ll have time to do these in the days leading up to your party, or even the day before. Here are some of the most common last-minute to-dos not to forget about:

• Cake pickup, since a fresh-baked cake just isn’t ready until right before the party!
• Last-minute grocery dash for snacks, ice, and other odds and ends
• Prepping party favors, including wrapping any guest gifts
• Laying out and inventorying decorations so you’ve got everything on hand
• Tidying the party venue, especially if it’s your home!

Step 14: Party set-up (Day before or day of party)

You’ve put everything in place and taken all the steps to plan a perfect party. Now it’s time for the final stretch: the actual party set-up. It’s time to transform your venue into the perfect party zone!

From putting up the decorations to doing any last-minute pre-meal food prep, this step — which is really a series of smaller steps — can take longer than you might think at first. Be sure to budget yourself enough time at the venue before the party starts to get it all done.

Langhorne and Moralez faced this challenge at his Unbirthday Gala. After all, transforming a beautiful backyard into Wonderland takes a while. “I wish I had given myself more time in setting up,” he said — even though he arrived a full four hours before the start time. The full setup process really needed seven or so hours, he estimated.

Of course, such an impressive gala is an edge case, but even for a more casual party, there’s plenty to do. Again, your specifics will vary, but here’s a rough sketch of a party set-up timeline:

• The day before: Put together any challenging decorations, like threading garlands or assembling larger props.
• Two hours before party time: Decorate the space, hanging banners on walls and filling balloons; set up games or activities.
• One hour before party time: Set tables, place party favors in their locations, and fill the drinks cooler with ice and beverages.
• Half an hour before party time: Do any last-minute food prep, set out snacks, and do a final walk-through to ensure restrooms have toilet paper, etc.
• Fifteen minutes before party time: Don’t forget to snap a “before” selfie!

Pro Tip: Checklist apps on your phone, like TickTick, can help you keep your set-up (and break-down!) steps organized right in the palm of your hand. You can even create different lists and labels to further organize and itemize. 

Step 15: Be present (Enjoy your big day!)

Finally: it’s party time! Goodness knows you did your due diligence in planning it. Now that the clockwork is in motion, your job is to sit back, relax, and enjoy the fruits of your labor. (This is another great reason to consider hiring a party planner: If any last-minute surprises or needs come up, they can handle it.)

Case in point: Langhorne’s party. Although he was initially upset by what felt like mismatched timing — especially as guests began to arrive before he was ready. 

Fortunately, Moralez was there to talk him down. “If she wasn’t there, I wouldn’t know what to do,” said Langhorne, who called her in a panic. On the other end of the line, she said “Breathe, you’re okay.” 

With Moralez at the party to ensure everything was running smoothly, Langhorne disappeared for an hour or so to get himself ready — which ended up being right on theme. He re-arrived a fashionable 45 minutes late to his very important date, dressed to the nines. It turned into a grand entrance: He was received with applause and cheers from his gathered crowd of guests.

Step 16: Party breakdown (Day of or day after)

What goes up must come down — and that’s true, too, of all the setup you’ve put in place for your party. In fact, a common error, especially for hosts who rent a party venue, is to forget to factor in the time you’ll need to break everything down and clean everything up afterward. Be sure to factor that in!

You know the drill by now: The specifics of your party breakdown will depend on the party itself. In general, though, here’s a quick checklist of things to make sure you’ve covered:

• Food-related cleanup and dishes
• Take down decorations, props and features
• Put away or return rentals and extras like tables and chairs
• Collect all gifts and cards to take home
• Clean and disinfect all surfaces
• Clean floors — sweeping/vacuuming and mopping as needed
• Pack everything into return vehicle

You’ll likely want to budget yourself at least one hour, and potentially two, to take care of all of these items. You could even turn it into an afterparty of sorts — many hands make light work, and even cleaning can be fun if the company’s right. 

Pro Tip: If you’ve rented a venue through Peerspace, your rental host may also have specific clean-up or check-out requirements. Be sure to read through the host rules to ensure you’ve got everything in ship shape!

Common birthday planning questions, answered

You’ve got even more questions about birthday party planning — and we have answers!

How planning differs when it’s your party vs. someone else’s

While we’ve focused primarily on planning your own party, here’s a twist: 55% of our survey respondents weren’t talking about their own parties—they were sharing insights from planning for someone else.

The good news is, whether you’re figuring out how to plan a birthday party for a friend or for yourself, the steps provided here are largely the same. The main difference is in making sure that the choices you’re making align with the birthday person’s desires.

How far in advance should you plan a birthday party?

If you’ve read this far, you probably already know our answer: The further you plan ahead, the better. Six months before your birthday is not too soon to be thinking about what you want the party to look like.

Even if it’s a relatively simple get-together, having lots of lead time puts you in the best possible position to get everything done in as stress-free a way as possible. On Peerspace, most people book a venue about 32 days before their party. Our experts think this is cutting it close, but it’s possible! 

“Most people tend to underestimate the amount of time each step of the party planning takes,” says Leo. “Everything from sourcing ideas, decor, and entertainment to prepping the food and table decor.” So even once you have your vision fully defined, don’t put off the little stuff until the last minute. Staying active in the weeks leading up to your party will keep you from having to rush to get everything done in the days immediately beforehand.

What is the order of events for a birthday party?

Even if you’ve done your due diligence with planning what the party will be like, it’s a whole separate process to plan the exact order of events on that day and how the party will go — one that can sneak up on you at the last minute. 

Although the specific order of events will depend on the party you’re planning, the important thing is to think about it so you’re not left scrambling at the last moment. This is another area where a party planner can be a great help — you can simply delegate it to them!

Here’s a sample schedule for how your party could go:

• 4 p.m. – 5 p.m. Arrive at venue; set-up 
• 5 p.m. – 5:45 p.m. Guests arrive; mingling with welcome cocktails
• 5:45 p.m. – 6:30 p.m. Opening icebreaker game (if your guests don’t all know each other already)
• 6:30 p.m. – 7:45 p.m. Sit-down dinner
• 7:45 p.m. – 10 p.m. DJ-led dance floor and open bar 
• 10 p.m. – 11 p.m. Guests say goodbye; post-party cleaning

Pro Tip: No matter what order of events you choose for the day, be sure to factor in setup and breakdown time!

Special party plans call for special tips

Every party is special — but some are extra special.

Tips for throwing unforgettable milestone parties

While every single birthday is a once-in-a-lifetime event, some just feel bigger. Whether it’s how to plan a 40th, 50th or 60th birthday party you’re after, the advice here will work — especially if you look toward the more elaborate celebration Langhorne threw. You may just need to scale up the grandeur (or the guest list) to honor such a special occasion. 

(Then again, you can also throw an all-out ball for your 27th like Santiago!)

How to successfully plan a surprise party

The very first step in planning a surprise party is to make sure the guest of honor is actually the type who enjoys surprises. Some people love the thrill, while others would rather skip the shock factor altogether — so check this box before moving forward.

Once you know a surprise is welcome, the next key is to craft a believable cover story. If something feels off, the birthday person will pick up on it quickly. The easiest trick is to lean on an existing routine. Maybe you always grab drinks after work on Thursdays — perfect cover for leading them to a room full of friends without raising suspicion.

Of course, a great surprise party depends on secrecy. Everyone on the guest list needs to be able to keep the plan under wraps, no matter how tempting it is to spill. Use private invites or group chats that don’t risk tipping off the honoree, and remind guests to be mindful of little giveaways — like parking too obviously near the venue.

When the day comes, timing matters. Ask guests to arrive 15–30 minutes early so the coast is clear. Decide ahead of time how the reveal will happen — whether it’s lights off and everyone shouting “surprise!” or a casual walk-in with the crowd already gathered.

And finally, don’t forget to capture the moment. Have someone ready with a camera or phone so the big reveal — and the reaction you worked so hard for — is preserved forever.

How to pull off a joint birthday party

The only thing better than celebrating one awesome person’s birthday is celebrating two or more — which is why joint birthday parties are becoming more popular. (They can also simply be more convenient, especially if you’re a parent planning multiple kids’ parties.) 

The main trick here is to ensure that the party meets the needs and interests of everyone being celebrated, which can, indeed, be a bit of a challenge. The key comes down to communicating openly and — perhaps most importantly — early, so there’s plenty of time to come to an agreement (or at least a compromise) on primary decisions like the venue.

There is also wiggle room to cater to multiple birthday wishes: You can save time for two different party games, for example, or serve two different meal options. While doing so might expand the total party budget, it’ll likely still be less expensive than throwing two entirely different events!

As promised: The full budget breakdowns

As promised above, here are the full budget breakdowns for our party hosts. As you can see, even the categories themselves vary depending on your priorities!

Isabelle Santiago’s 27th Murder Mystery Bash:

• Peerspace venue: $336
• Entertainment/murder mystery hosting: $675 
• Food: $500 
• Drinks: $0 (BYOB) 
• Decor: $230
• Chairs: $170

Total: $1,911

Theron Langhorne’s 50th Unbirthday Gala:

• Party decor and props: $5,800
• Tables, linens, tableware, chairs, turf, glassware, etc: $3,800
• Peerspace venue: $3,500
• Catering:  $4,400
• Balloon hoop and balloon bounce house:  $1,100
• Photo booths: $700
• Professional photography: $500
• DJ: $400
• Flower wall and lighted letters. $400
• Alice impersonator: $350
• Queen of Hearts impersonator:  $200
• Game rental: $150

Total: $21,300

Save it, share it, screenshot it — your group chat will thank you

Congratulations on celebrating your big day your way — and for finding help along the way, too. As all of our interviewees have affirmed, planning, just like partying, is better when shared. And fortunately, now you also have incredible photos to share, even with the people who weren’t lucky enough to make it!

When you’re ready to find an incredible venue for your next birthday party, Peerspace is waiting! We’d love for you to tag us in your Instagram posts from past parties and share your photos on Made in Peerspace (you’ll get an email after your event with submission details). We’re always excited to see the magic guests create in these one-of-a-kind spaces.